Insane jump-roping, must watch. →
My affection for a lady's posterior has increased...
I do not care if a lady is shaved or not.
Anonymous asked: i totally have a crush on you.
When I was in the 1st grade, I'd punch myself in...
- I’ve never dated a girl with a pixie haircut (but I want to). - I’ve never had sex in a public place. - I’ve never done a drug harder than weed. - I’ve never been arrested. - I’ve never been stabbed or shot. - I’ve never performed a money shot. - I’ve never put it in a ladies butt. - I’ve never blacked out from drinking. -...
My night has turned into a waiting game.
When should I eat my Marie Calendars microwavable dinner? I cannot decide. I feel as though if I eat it now I will be hungry later, but it is hard to resist the temptation of mashed potatoes and chicken fried steak. It is hard to resist. It’s only 7:42.
"I will often think of you when I am in...
I can’t think. I hate hitting mental roadblocks. I need to piece together a skeleton for my speech tomorrow, and I need to get a decent chunk of my research paper rough draft done tonight too. The speech is a persuasive based on some sort of socio-political issue of my choosing, something that I can back up with statistics, and that has definite opposing sides. I’m trying to stay...
I wish I had a fancy camera.
I would take pictures of SO many cats. But alas, I cannot afford such a thing.
I plan to play video games now, and rationalize it...
Most commonly used phrases while driving:
- “What the fuck, asshole!?” - “Holy shit, learn to drive dickhole!” - “I am going to murder everybody today.” - “Am I the only one who knows how to drive?” - “Use your blinker, cockmonger!” - “I FUCKED YOUR MOM.” - “Can I get a double-decker without lettuce and a steak taquito?” - “THAT ISN’T...
Uncomfortable tingle at tip of penis:
Start punching own crotch.
Anonymous asked: What was your speech about? Where do you go to school?
My feet are too cold, I can't think.
My Top 5 Artists (Week Ending 2010-11-28) →
Daft Punk (18) Kanye West (10) Menomena (7) Blockhead (6) Aphex Twin (6) Imported from Last.fm Tumblr by JoeLaz
That awkward moment when the Doctor tells you he's...
When a girl affectionately calls me "sweetie" my...
I just want to wear thermals, eat cookies and play...
I hate it when people watch me eat.
I get self-conscious, and when I go to take a bite I miss my mouth by a mile because I’m so distracted. Sauce EVERYWHERE.
I don't want my grandpa to die.
(sad rant, ignore if you don’t care for that sort of thing) I would give anything to keep that from happening out of turn, but by this time next year there is a very good chance he won’t be here, and I don’t know how I’m going to handle that. The only family members who have passed in my lifetime are my cousin Kevin, who I didn’t see much and suffered a pretty...
This train ride is officially boring now.
Ordering cocktails did not help.